Young Earth - Old Earth

Dr. Wile, the author of the Apologia science texts (for older students) was asked this specific question when my husband and I sat in on a lecture he presented at our state's Christian homeschooling conference several years ago. He specifically told us that he believes that there is not enough evidence to support either theory (young earth or old earth), or that the scientific facts don't clearly point to a specific age, and that we really just cannot tell how far back it was when God created the earth.However, he does NOT believe in evolution, and I haven't seen anything in his science texts so far that would state a belief in the earth being billions of years old. He is undeniably a creationist, which can be seen all over their website. But, directly from him, he told us that he cannot locate specific evidence in the Bible or in science that absolutely proves without a doubt that the earth is only 6,000 - 12,000 years old vs. hundreds of thousands of years old.Here are the conclusions he presented in a handout he told us to read at his website, back then:Conclusions:• Salt in the ocean leads to a maximum age of 62 million years• Helium in the atmosphere leads to a maximum age of 2 million years• Dendrochronology indicates that the most likely age is several thousand years• The ONLY successful model of planetary magnetic fields indicates a maximum age of 9,000years• The lack of short-lived radioisotopes indicates a minimum age of several hundred millionyears, but this depends on an assumption that does not seem reliable.• Radiometric dating is not reliable, except for the specific case of carbon-14 dating over thepast 3,000 years, assuming the radioactive decay rate is constant over than time period.Here is the link to the article that Dr. Wile wrote:http://www.apologiaonline.com/conf/ageearth.pdfHopefully, that should answer her questions, although you could email or call Apologia and ask them yourself and answer the lady's questions that way. I have a feeling that while Apologia's science texts are unabashedly written from the creationist point of view, I don't think they ever straight out address the issue of which "year" exactly they "think" the earth was created.Hope that makes sense and is helpful.Julieanne

Best ways to avoid spoiling your kids

The BabyCenter 7: Best ways to avoid spoiling your kids
by Melanie HaikenLast updated: February 2008


Love knows no limits, right? Wrong! If you want to raise well-mannered children, you'll need to establish some ground rules. Nip bad behaviors in the bud with these seven steps:

1. Set clear, simple limitsThink of it this way: If you leave no room for reinterpretation, you save yourself arguing later. Listen to the difference between "Oh okay, you can have a cookie..." (plenty of room for hope that a second one might be okay) and "You can have one cookie, but don't ask me for a second one. This is it."

2. Stick to those limits no matter whatOne really means one. It's happened to all of us: We say no to more than one cookie, and then we start second-guessing ourselves. The trick here is to take a long-term view. Maybe a second cookie really would be okay just this once, but do you really want to be second-guessed every time you set a limit? That will happen if you change your story.

3. Never give in to beggingThis one's simple — once you do, you've taught your child that begging works, right?

4. Make your child convince youIf she wants something you're not sure about, ask her to make a case for it. She wants to watch a favorite TV show? If she explains that all her homework is done and she's practiced piano, you can feel comfortable saying yes.

5. Require that chores get done before funYou don't do your child any favors by being a softy. Studies show that being strict on chores and responsibilities helps him develop the ability to cope with frustration.

6. Don't be afraid to disappointWe hate to see our kids sad, but the Stones said it best: You can't always get what you want. And studies show that learning to accept disappointment will give your child important coping skills to deal with emotional stress later in life.

7. Let them work for what they wantMany experts believe that kids become spoiled when things come too easily, encouraging them to take those things for granted. If your child wants a new bike, set up a reward system for good behavior and let him earn it bit by bit.

What's your discipline style?

What's your discipline style?by Evonne LackLast updated: March 2008
HighlightsSimilarities in discipline theoriesWhere the discipline theories differFive basic discipline philosophies

Discipline is one of the toughest challenges of parenthood. It can frustrate, discourage, and humble you. When faced with the challenges of getting your toddler, preschooler, or big kid to behave, you may look back on the gritty baby months with utter nostalgia and wonder why you ever thought feeding and sleeping dilemmas were so tough.The right expert advice can be instructive and reassuring. It's just a matter of finding a philosophy that fits your personal style.

But how do you choose when the discipline field appears to be one big, messy mishmash of information?You'll be relieved to know that you don't have to pick just one discipline style. You may like certain aspects of several different discipline styles. It's okay to select the things you like and leave the rest.Also, it's important to pay attention to how you feel when you read about a particular style. For example, Brooklyn mom Popi Pustilnik says, "One book made me feel like such a failure that I threw it across the room." She then turned to a book with a completely different approach and felt much more hopeful. "It was a much better fit for me," she says.

Our quick-read chart of discipline styles: read it online or print it now.Start by learning about a few of the major "categories" of discipline philosophies. Once you get a handle on these, it will be easier to choose books that are a good fit for you.

Similarities in discipline theories
Although the discipline field is vast, many of the most popular discipline books address similar themes. Here are some of the big ones:
1. Aim for the middle ground between being too punitive and too permissive.
2. Don't use physical punishments like spanking and slapping.
3. Don't use psychological punishments such as name-calling and insults.
4. When you or your child spiral out of control, take time to cool off.
5. Offer choices.
6. Learn how to manage your own anger.
7. Provide encouragement and positive feedback.
8. Let your child experience consequences to behavior.
9. Don't hold grudges. Once the behavior has been dealt with, give your child a clean slate.

Where the discipline theories differ
One expert suggests that time-outs last a minute for each year of your child's age, while another says your child should decide how long the time-out lasts. One book instructs you to firmly tell your child, "No hitting," and another book cautions against using negative words like "no" and "don't." One author promotes the use of rewards, whereas another says rewards are nothing more than bribes.The wide variety of advice can be frustrating and confusing, but it also proves that there's no one right way to discipline. You are the true expert on what works for you and for your children. While professional advice is helpful, it needs to match your own intuition and ideals.

Five basic discipline philosophies

Take a look at these categories of discipline approaches and see what appeals to you:

1. Boundary-based discipline: Children need boundaries to feel safe. If they don't know where the boundaries are, they'll "test" until they find them. "What happens if I throw my spoon?" a toddler wonders, clanging his spoon noisily onto the floor. "Hmm ... not much of a reaction. How about if I throw my entire plate?" An older child might test limits by leaving her colored pencils in a glorious mess on the rug, or by taking several decades to get ready in the mornings.Clearly communicate your boundaries (for example, "Please put my things back in my purse when you're done looking at them"). If this doesn't do the trick, follow through with a consequence. Try to make the consequence a logical fit for the behavior. For example, if your child leaves your wallet, hairbrush, and car keys strewn around the living room floor, she loses purse-inspection privileges for a while.Use "natural consequences," too.
For example, if your child forgets his lunch box, don't rush it to school. Instead, let him experience the consequences.Provide "limited choices" to give your child some wiggle room. Suppose your 5-year-old is loudly banging on her electronic toy piano, with the volume on maximum. Through your migraine, you respectfully ask her to turn it down. She ignores you. Offer a choice: "You can either turn the volume down now, or I'll put the piano away until tomorrow." This puts the responsibility in her hands.

2. Gentle discipline: A child can't learn much about behavior when she's screaming and crying. She (and you) can benefit greatly from daily preventive techniques — strategies that reduce opportunities for misbehavior. For example, create routines so that your child feels grounded. Offer choices to give her a sense of control, such as, "Would you like to wear the red pajamas or the blue?" Give warnings before transitions, as in, "We need to leave the playground in five minutes."Frame your requests positively. For example, say, "Please use your big girl voice," instead of, "Don't whine." When possible, use "when, then" statements instead of outright no's, as in, "When we're done with dinner, then we can go outside."When misbehavior occurs, turn to diffusion. First see if there's an underlying problem, such as tiredness, boredom, or hunger. Once you address this need, the misbehavior may magically disappear.If not, turn to what author Elizabeth Pantley calls a "laundry bag" of tricks. This is a large collection, including silly games, distraction, redirection, validation, and self-soothing. You can pull a trick out of your hat — er, laundry bag — whenever it's time to derail your child from the misbehavior train. For example, if he refuses to take a bath, try making the washcloth "talk" to him in a playful voice. If this doesn't work, you can try something else, such as validation and redirection ("It's hard when you have to do something you don't want to do. How about if we see how quickly we can get it done? I'll get a clock.")

3. Positive discipline: Children behave well when they feel encouraged and have a sense of belonging. Misbehavior happens when children are feeling discouraged.Talk with your child and try to find out what the underlying cause is for her misbehavior. For example, suppose your 3-year-old refuses to bring her plate to the sink. Is she afraid she'll break the plate? Is she trying to get attention? Perhaps it gives her a sense of power. Or maybe she's hurt about something else and is trying to "get you back."Once you know the reason, you give her the right kind of encouragement and work out a solution. For example, if she's struggling with powerlessness, you could encourage her by saying, "We need to get the table clean. Can you help me figure out how to do it?"In positive discipline, misbehavior is seen as an opportunity for learning, and children are actively engaged in coming up with a solution. It's okay for a child to enjoy the solution — in fact, it's preferable.F or example, if your 8-year-old spills soda on the couch and the two of you decide that the solution is for him to steam-clean the stain (using his allowance to pay for the steamer rental), he might enjoy this task. This doesn't mean he'll continue to spill soda on the couch in order to get to use the steamer. It means he's learning how to take responsibility for a mistake — and better yet, he's invested in his own learning.

4. Emotion-coaching: When children can recognize and understand their own feelings, they make better choices. You can teach your child to do this, and it will help strengthen the connection between the two of you.Know your own standards for what is and is not acceptable behavior. Make sure you're up front with your child about these, and talk with him about some of the feelings he might experience in certain situations.For example, if he's been known to hit other kids and several friends are coming over, you might explain that it could get overwhelming for him. Suggest to him that if he starts to feel frustrated, he can spend some quiet time in his room — but hitting the other children is not acceptable.Learn the skill of empathy. This means putting yourself in your child's shoes: What are the "real feelings" behind her misbehavior? Reflect these back to her, as in, "It's hard when we really want something and we can't have it. I bet you're feeling really disappointed right now."When your child feels that you understand her, she'll trust you. Within this context of trust, she'll be open to you when you teach her about responsible choices. ("We can't buy candy every time we see it. Too much candy isn't good for our bodies.")

5. Behavior modification: Positive reinforcement helps children increase good behavior and negative reinforcement helps them decrease misbehavior. This approach is similar to boundary-based discipline in that it emphasizes clear limits and backing them up with consequences. But in behavior modification, there's more emphasis on warnings and rewards.Use warnings to help your child take responsibility for stopping the misbehavior on his own. For example, if your child is arguing with you because you told him he can't have a cookie before dinner, don't get caught up in the skirmish. Tell him to stop arguing about it, and that this is his first "warning." If he persists, give him a second warning, and if he doesn't stop, calmly tell him to take a time-out (these should be brief — just a few minutes long).For more "serious offenses," come up with a consequence other than time-out. For example, if your child persistently teases the dog and is old enough to know better, you might take away her television privileges for a couple of days.Rewards motivate your child to do well. This could be as simple as parental praise. In some cases you might want to set up a charting system with more tangible rewards. For example, for every morning that your child is ready on time to go to daycare, she gets a star in her chart. When she racks up five stars, she gets a treat.

These brief descriptions don't tell the whole story, of course. It's not as if boundary-based discipline doesn't include preventive techniques — it does. And gentle discipline includes the use of consequences.In fact, all of these styles overlap. The differences are more a matter of what they emphasize. Think about the primary colors — red, blue, and yellow. They contain no common elements. Discipline philosophies are more like secondary colors (orange, purple, green), which contain blends of more than one hue. Some may have a dash more red, and others may pour on the blue. What color will your discipline style be?

The discipline tool kit: Successful strategies for every age

The discipline tool kit: Successful strategies for every ageby Melanie HaikenLast updated: August 2008

We've all seen them: the out-of-control toddler hurling handfuls of sand at the park; the whiny-voiced 3-year-old begging for candy in the grocery line; the sassy 7-year-old yelling "you can't make me!" at the restaurant.And we've privately dissed their parents, reassuring ourselves that we'd never be such a wimp if our child was terrorizing the playground or disrupting everyone's dinner.But then it happens: the massive meltdown that takes you completely by surprise. And suddenly you are that parent — the one flailing to figure out what to do. The truth is, every child presents discipline challenges at every age, and it's up to us to figure out how to handle them.

Why is discipline such a big dilemma? Because it feels like a tightrope act. On one side there's the peril of permissiveness — no one wants to raise a brat. On the other side there's the fear of over-control — who wants to be the hardliner raising cowed, sullen kids?What we need is a comfortable middle ground to ensure that our little ones grow up to be respectful, caring, and well behaved.

First, the ground rules
To set the stage for discipline success, here are the bottom-line rules many experts agree on:

1. We're all in this together. Right from the start, teach your kids that your family is a mutual support system, meaning that everyone pitches in. Even a baby can learn to "help" you lift her by reaching out her arms, says Madelyn Swift, founder and director of Childright and author of Discipline for Life, Getting It Right With Children.

2. Respect is mutual. One of the most common complaints parents and kids have about each other is "You're not listening." Set a good example early on: When your child tries to tell you something, stop what you're doing, focus your attention, and listen. Later you can require the same courtesy from her.

3. Consistency is king. One good way to raise a child with emotional strength? Be consistent and unwavering about rules and chores, says Harvard professor Dan Kindlon, author of Too Much of a Good Thing. Even if you pick just one chore to insist on, your child will be better off, Kindlon says. "Being firm and consistent teaches your child that you care enough about him to expect responsible behavior."

4. Life's not always fair. We're so afraid of disappointing or upsetting our kids — too afraid, say some discipline pros. "If a child never experiences the pain of frustration — of having to share a toy or wait their turn in line — or if they're never sad or disappointed, they won't develop psychological skills that are crucial for their future happiness," says Kindlon. So if your child's upset because a younger sibling got a different punishment, for example, it's okay to say "I understand that this seems unfair to you, and I'm sorry you're upset, but life isn't always fair."

The tools: Babies, toddlers, and up
A disclaimer: These tools aren't guaranteed to work every time, and none of them will be right for every parent and child. But they will give you options — and what parent doesn't need more to choose from in his or her personal bag of tricks?

Tool: Lavish loveAge: Birth to 12 months (and beyond!)
How it works: It's easy to wonder whether you're giving in when you pick your baby up for the umpteenth time. Is it time to start setting limits? Not yet, say the pros. Responding to your baby's needs won't make her overly demanding or "spoiled." "It's impossible to spoil or overindulge a baby," says Kathryn Kvols, an expert who teaches parenting workshops on discipline and development.In fact, the opposite is true: By giving your child as much love and attention as possible now, you're helping her become a well-adjusted and well-behaved person. "Your baby is developing trust in her parents, and she does that by knowing that you'll be there to meet her needs," Kvols says.That trust means that in the long run your child will feel more secure and less anxious, knowing that you take her wants and needs seriously. She'll have confidence in you later, when it's time to set boundaries and lay down rules, and understand that you love her even when you correct her.
Real-life application: Your 4-month-old is crying even though you nursed her a half-hour ago. Your mother-in-law says to let her cry it out. Wrong, say experts: By crying she's telling you she needs something, even if you don't know what it is. Try walking with her, nursing her again, or singing to her. She needs to know you'll be there for her, even if all that's wrong is that she wants to be held.

Tool: Remove and substitute Age: 6 to 18 monthsHow it works: Like the rest of us, young children learn by doing — so when your baby throws his bowl of peas off the highchair tray, it's because he's curious to see what will happen, not because he wants to upset you or mess up your clean kitchen floor.That said, you don't have to stand by while your child does something you don't like. And you definitely don't want to stand by if your little one's grabbing for something dangerous. Take the object away or physically move your baby away from it. Then give him a safe, less-messy or less-destructive alternative. "Substituting something else will prevent a meltdown," Kvols says.Make sure you explain what you're doing to your child, even if he's too young to really understand. You're teaching a fundamental discipline lesson — that some behaviors aren't acceptable, and that you'll be redirecting him when necessary.
Real-life application: Your 8-month-old keeps grabbing your favorite necklace and chewing on the beads. Instead of letting him, or continuing to pull it out of his hands, unclasp the necklace and put it aside, explaining simply that your jewelry is not for chewing. Then hand your baby a teething ring or another chewable toy and say, "This is fine to chew on."

Tool: Right wrongs together Age: 12 to 24 monthsHow it works: Going back to the peas example above — there's a difference between a baby who playfully throws her bowl to the floor and a young toddler who knows she's creating a mess for Mommy or Daddy to clean up.That turning point happens when your child becomes capable of knowing when she's doing something she's not supposed to, often around her first birthday. "When she looks at you with that glint in her eye and then drops the peas, you know it's time to do something." says expert Madelyn Swift. What you do, says Swift, is start teaching the concept of taking responsibility for her actions.
Real-life application: Your toddler's made a mess under her highchair. When she's finished eating, lift her up, set her on the floor, and ask her to hand you some peas so she's "helping" you take care of it. Talk to her about what you're doing: "Okay, we made a mess with the peas so we have to clean it up."

Tool: Emphasize the positive Age: 12 months and upHow it works: This one's easy: Tell your child when you like how he's behaving, rather than speaking up only when he's doing something wrong. "It takes a bit of practice to get in the habit of rewarding good behavior rather than punishing bad, but it's more effective in the end," says Ruth Peters, a clinical psychologist in Clearwater, Florida, and author of Don't Be Afraid to Discipline and other books.
Real-life application: It's nap time, a potential battle zone with your sometimes resistant toddler. Head it off by praising even small steps: "It's so great that you stopped playing with your blocks when I asked you to. That means we have extra time and can read a story. If you lie down right away, we'll have even more time and can read two stories." Keep praising each improvement he makes in his nap time routine, and make it worth his while with rewards such as stories or songs.

Tool: Ask for your child's help Age: 12 months to 8 yearsHow it works: Researchers know something parents may not: Kids come into the world programmed to be helpful and cooperative. All we have to do as parents is take advantage of this natural tendency. "Kids are innately wired to want to cooperate," says Kathryn Kvols. "A lot of times we parents just don't notice this because we don't expect children to be helpful."A 2006 study backs up this idea: Researchers at the Max Planck Institute for Evolutionary Anthropology discovered that toddlers as young as 18 months already have full-fledged qualities of altruism and cooperation.The way they demonstrated this was simple. A researcher would "struggle" to hang up a towel with a clothespin or stack up a pile of books. When he dropped the clothespin or tipped the books over, the toddlers would race to pick up the clothespin and hand it back, or restack the books. But when the researcher made the same mistakes without struggling — that is, without looking like he needed help — the toddlers didn't budge. They understood what it meant to be helpful.Get your child involved in daily tasks around the house so she learns that everybody works together. "I recommend that parents find things their children can do, whether it's washing vegetables, feeding the dog, or sorting laundry," Kvols says. "You're teaching your child to be helpful, which is one of the most important life skills. We've found time and again that the people who are most mentally healthy are those who've learned to be of service to others."While this may not sound like a discipline strategy, just wait: If you've taught your child to be cooperative, you can call on this quality when you need it. For example, giving your toddler a "job" to do can defuse some of the most common tantrum-provoking situations. Kathryn Kvols put this to use when her son, Tyler, refused to get into his car seat. She made him "boss of the seatbelts" — he had to make sure everyone in the car was buckled in before the driver could start the car. The battle over the car seat was over.
Real-life application: Let's take the grocery store aisle, site of infamous meltdowns. When your child wriggles to get out of the cart, you can hold up a box of raisins and say: "I need to get food for us to eat, and I need you to help me." Then hand him the box and let him drop it behind him into the cart. You can also ask him to be your "lookout" and help you spot certain favorite foods on the shelf.

Tool: Manage anger Age: 12 to 24 months How it works: Toddlers are tantrum-prone because they're not yet able to control their emotions, experts say. "Tantrums aren't really a discipline issue, they're about anger management," says Madelyn Swift. "Tantrums happen when kids don't get their way and they're mad."Step one in this situation is to let your child calm down in whatever way works best for her. If she'll let you hold her, hug and rock her until she's quiet. If touching her only sets her off again, give her space to calm down by herself.Don't try to talk to her about what happened until she's over the emotional storm, Swift says. But once it's over, don't let relief prevent you from addressing what happened. Instead, replay the tape and return to the scene of the crime. It's time to fix whatever mistakes were made.
Real-life application: Your toddler didn't want to get dressed and threw a fit, hurling toy cars around the room. Once she's stable, take her back to the toy cars and calmly but firmly tell her it's time to pick them up. If the task seems too daunting, split it up. Point to one pile of cars and say, "You pick up these cars and I'll pick up the ones over there." Stay there until your toddler has finished her portion of the job.If she refuses and has another tantrum, the cycle repeats itself. But wait longer for her to settle down this time, and make sure she knows you mean business. Then back to the cars you go.Tool: Talk toddler-eseAge: 12 to 24 monthsHow it works: The secret to getting your toddler to do what's right — or to stop doing what he shouldn't — can be as simple as communicating in a way he can truly understand. Pediatrician Harvey Karp, author of The Happiest Toddler on the Block, tells parents to view their toddler as a "little Neanderthal" and talk to him as such. In other words, get down to his "primitive" level and keep it really, really simple.Karp calls his communication strategy The Fast Food Rule because you're basically operating like a drive-through cashier: You repeat back the order, then name the price. Use short phrases with lots of repetition, gestures, and emotion to show your child that you get what's going on in his head.Real-life application: Your toddler yanks a truck out of his friend's hands. Instead of plopping him down in a time-out or trying to explain why what he did was wrong — both strategies that assume your child's more sophisticated than he is — take a few minutes to echo what he seems to be thinking and feeling back to him: "You want the truck."Validating your child's feelings will help him settle down, and once he's calm enough to listen, you can deliver your discipline message. But again, give him the stripped-down version: "No grab, no grab, it's Max's turn." Note: This may feel silly at first, but it will work.

Tool: Listen to "no"Age: 12 to 36 monthsHow it works: "No" is one of the first words many kids learn to say, and it almost immediately becomes the one they say most often. As parents know, the constant negativity and refusals can get a little tiresome. Strange as it may sound, one way to prevent "the endless no's" is to try and take "no" seriously when your child says it. After all, we all have a tendency to repeat ourselves when we don't think people are listening, right?Real-life application: Your toddler's running around in a dirty diaper, but she refuses to stop and let you change it. "Start by asking if she wants her diaper changed, and if she says no, say okay and let it go for a while," says Kvols. Wait five minutes and ask again, and if you get another no, wait again.Usually by the third time you ask, discomfort will have set in and you'll get a yes. And knowing that saying no carries some weight will stop your child from saying it automatically. "The more you respect their no, the less often they use it," Kvols says.

The tools: Preschoolers and up

Tool: Use time-outs and time-ins Age: 2 to 4 yearsHow it works: The time-out is one of the best-known discipline tactics, but it's also somewhat controversial. Some experts think time-outs don't work well, are overused, and feel too punitive — especially for young preschoolers. "When we say 'Go to your room,' we're teaching them we're in control, when we really want them to learn to control themselves," says expert Kathryn Kvols.In fact, for some kids time-outs can be so upsetting that they trigger tantrums, something you want to prevent. To avoid this, treat time-outs as a brief cooling-off period for both of you. (One minute or less is probably long enough for a 2-year-old. Don't start using the one-minute-per-year guideline until your child's at least 3.)Let your little one know that you need the time as much as he does by saying, "We're both really mad right now and we need to calm down." Designate an area of your house as a self-calming place for your child (preferably this won't be in your child's room, which should have only positive associations), and direct him to go there for a few minutes while you go to your own corner.Another possibility: Take time-outs together by sitting down side by side. You can also balance the impact of time-outs by instituting "time-ins" — moments of big hugs, cuddles, and praise to celebrate occasions when your child behaves well.
Real-life application: You said no dessert tonight, triggering a tantrum, and now your child's screams for a cookie are only slightly louder than yours. Explain that it's not okay for either of you to scream at the other, so you both need to calm down. Lead her to her self-calming space (Kvols says the only thing that worked for her daughter was to go outside into the garden), and then sit down nearby yourself.When a few minutes have passed and the anger has subsided, explain that it's not okay to throw a fit to get what she wants and that you're sorry she's disappointed. (Hint: On a future night when a treat is okay, give her one and praise the fact that she's stopped fussing to get dessert.)

Tool: Try reverse rewards Age: 3 to 8 yearsHow it works: Take a page from teachers everywhere — kids respond much better to positive reinforcement than to reproach and punishment. And they also like structure and clear expectations. Ruth Peters, the clinical psychologist in Clearwater, Florida, advises parents to take advantage of these qualities by setting up a system of rewards. You can make this system even more effective by reversing the usual rules — instead of giving rewards for good behavior, take them away for bad behavior.
Real-life application: Put a few things your child loves — these could be a Hershey's kiss, a new colored pencil, and a card good for an extra bedtime story — in a jar or box as the day's rewards. Then draw three smiley faces on a piece of paper and tape it to the jar. If your child breaks a rule or otherwise misbehaves, you cross out a smiley face and one treat disappears from the jar. An hour or so before bedtime, you give your child everything that remains.

The tools: Grade-schoolers

Tool: Teach consequences Age: 5 to 8 yearsHow it works: We want our children to make the right choices — finish their homework before they turn on the TV, for example, or not play ball in the house. But when they don't, what do we do?To handle problem behaviors, involve your child in finding a solution, says Harvard professor Dan Kindlon. For example, if he doesn't finish the night's homework, he may decide to wake up earlier the next morning to do it. Because this isn't a great long-term solution, make a plan for the future together: Does he want to do his homework before going out to play, or does he want to set aside time in the evening?If he's been part of the planning process, it'll be a lot harder for your child to pretend he just "forgot." But be consistent in enforcing limits — if the plan is to finish homework after dinner, it must be finished before the TV goes on.
Real-life application: Your 7-year-old breaks a lamp throwing a ball in the house. Instead of scolding him by saying that he wasn't supposed to be doing this in the first place, tell him it's up to him to fix his mistake. Have him glue the lamp back together if he can — if not, he can do extra chores to earn enough for a new lamp.

Tool: Allow redo's Age: 5 to 8 yearsHow it works: How many times have you wanted to take back something you said the moment you said it? Well, when your child sasses or snaps at you, and you snap right back, chances are everyone feels that way.One way to maintain peace in the family is to allow "redo's" — a chance for your child (or you!) to say what she wants again in a more respectful way. "When you tell your child 'redo,' you're saying, 'I want to hear what you've said, it's important to me, but I want to be respected. So say it in a more respectful tone and I'm happy to listen,'" says Kathryn Kvols.She and her daughter, Briana, even have a secret signal they use to tell each other to redo without having to say anything out loud. Asking for redo's when your child talks back keeps the situation from escalating. It also teaches her that speaking to people calmly is a better way to get the response she wants.
Real-life application: Your child screams "I hate you!" Stung and hurt, you immediately yell back, "Go to your room!" and the evening's lost. Instead, take a deep breath and ask your child if she wants a "redo" (or use your signal if you're in public). This gives your child a chance to articulate her feelings in a calm way rather than just exploding."You want your child to know that you're not trying to shut her up, and that you're capable of hearing the good and the bad," says Kvols. "Then you can address the issue that's actually at stake" — the underlying problem that prompted a regrettable comment in the first place.

Top 10 Childresn books on line

Here is a list of the top 10 places to get online books
International Children’s Digital LibraryThe search options for this website are incredible. You can search by age, language, subject, length, awards won, type of character, emotions, and much more. Most of the books are full color.

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Snowman Mints

1 Tbl butter
1 Tbl light corn syrup
1/8 tsp salt
1/2 tsp mint extract
1 C powdered sugar (gradually added in)

Mix all ingredients together but slowly add sugar in as you mix. This will be stiff.
Pull out about 1/4 of the dough and mix food coloring into it to make different color scarfs, hat etc.

When a child acts out in public to get their way

When your child acts out in public to get their way, you CAN get control back. Here, James Lehman, MSW lays out some step-by-step techniques for you to use next time you hit the mall or grocery store.

I’ve worked with many parents over the years who routinely gave in when their children acted out. One mother I met, I’ll call her Linda*, had a twelve-year-old son who often used emotional blackmail and threats of misbehavior to get his way. Linda dreaded taking him to the mall, because she knew she’d end up buying him anything he asked for in an effort to keep him from calling her names, stomping and yelling at her, and making a scene that left her feeling humiliated and powerless. In effect, her son’s behavior was holding her hostage.
Remember this: When you don’t give in to your child, they have to figure out another way to solve their problem.

So what happens if we always respond to this type of behavior by backing down? Your child learns that if he misbehaves or threatens to misbehave, that will solve his problem, because somebody’s going to give in. Make no mistake, the message you’re sending your child is that misbehavior works. When your child acts out in public, if they’re not responded to in an effective way, they develop a pattern of behavior where they learn how to blackmail you to give them their way. And their mindset is, “Give me my way or face my acting out.” That may involve yelling, screaming and tantrums if they’re younger. It may be angry faces and a disgusted tone, disrespectful remarks and even cursing when they get older. Either way, the whole game they’re playing involves using behavior to try to control outside circumstances, instead of learning how to solve the problems they face.

When kids learn this lesson, there are two outcomes. Your child discovers there’s absolutely no reason to change, no reason to mature. And every time you reward them for misbehavior, you’re making that portion of your child’s personality stronger. That’s right: you’re actually strengthening the part of them that wants to misbehave and that doesn’t want to follow social rules or be civilized. In fact, you can look at parenting in that way: our role is to teach our children the rules of how to be civilized and live in our society. And in our culture, we go to the mall, we go shopping, we treat people with respect, and we behave in an acceptable manner. When you give in to inappropriate behavior, your child grows up without the coping skills to deal with the difficult situations that life presents.

The other thing that you need to understand is that when your child uses acting out as a problem-solving skill, they are not learning how to develop other more appropriate problem solving skills. Kids will throw a tantrum when they’re frustrated or upset—that happens. But whether they’re throwing a fit because they’re frustrated, upset or overwhelmed, the same rules still apply. If you give in, you’re simply teaching your child to continue acting out in public.
A Word about Younger KidsWhen children between the age of two and three throw a tantrum, there should be no consequences other than to have them sit some place until they calm down. When most younger children get tired and overwhelmed, they have a hard time controlling their emotions. It’s part of a parent’s responsibility to know their kid, know how much stimulation they can take, and when they’re tired or hungry and need to leave.

When I’m at the mall or downtown where I live, in the late afternoon I’ll see little kids around the age of three, four, or five years old crying or really shutting down. I think most parents recognize that their kids are overly tired. But the adult mind manages stimulation very differently than a child’s mind. We know how to compartmentalize everything and weigh things out. For kids, stimulation comes at them like a wave. And being in a mall is like being at the circus for a child. I think that parents have to be aware of that and be tolerant of some frustration their kids will express. Parents also need to learn how to either avoid those situations or find ways to manage them.

When your young child throws a tantrum, whether it’s because he’s tired or because he’s angry at not getting his way, the management skills are the same: You wait it out. You give a little reassurance. You don’t give in.

5 Techniques to Help You Manage Your Child’s Acting Out Behavior
Remember, you’re the expert on your child. You know what makes your child tired. You know the extra help he needs. And you know the situations that are frustrating for him. Prepare your child before you go into any new or stimulating situation. Say, “If you start getting frustrated, let me know. We’ll take a rest. All right? If you get frustrated, if you can’t handle it, let me know, we’ll go home. And if you throw a tantrum, this is what I’m going to do.” I think by being realistic about your child’s temperament and discussing plans with them ahead of time, you can really enhance your ability to manage situations in public.

Train your child by taking small steps first. I think if parents have a child who acts out in public, you want to try what’s called a “slow immersion.” So in other words, if this kid can’t handle going to the mall, take him to the drug store first. Say, “Let’s see how you handle this. We’re going in for five or ten minutes.” Lay the rules down. That way you’re not at the mall, you’re in a more manageable location and you’re close by your child. Start to train them by taking small steps, by coaching them in little pieces: little pieces of learning how to socialize and solve problems and act like everybody else.

Write the Rules Down and Keep Them Handy. Before you even go into public, I think you need to decide what your limits are for your child in terms of behavior. Let them know exactly what’s going to happen. For pre-teen kids and under, keep a 4x6 index card in your car with 3 rules on it:
1. Respond to first request.
2. Accept “no” for an answer.
3. Don’t raise your voice or misbehave physically.
Read that card in the car before you go inside the mall or store. That one small act is going to help your child keep it together; reading the rules to them is like lending them structure. You can’t assume that kids are going to recall information that will help them change. Here’s another way of looking at it: Let’s say you’re speeding and you get a ticket. The assumption is that the next time you’re in a hurry, you’re going to remember how it felt to pay that ticket and you won’t speed. Even though that may be true, each state still has the speed limit posted every five miles. So give your child consistent reminders that will keep them focused.

When the rules are broken. If your child breaks the rules when you’re out, I would take them out of the department store. If they throw a tantrum, I would stay with them in that tantrum and when they are done, I would take them out of the mall. At this point, the show is over; there’s no way there’s going to be any more shopping. With younger kids, you can just hold their hand and take them to the car. But if they resist you, don’t get physical. Let them throw their tantrum. Have a seat, watch the show. And if people ask questions say, “He’s throwing a tantrum and there’s nothing I can do.” I think parents have to do that every time until the acting out in public stops. If possible, bring a magazine or a book so that the child can see that he's not getting your attention through that inappropriate behavior.

Let me assure you that I know how embarrassing this can be for parents. But you have to understand, your child also knows how uncomfortable their behavior makes you; that’s how your child is blackmailing you. So, in their mind it’s, “Let me have my way or I’m going to blackmail you in front of all these adults. I’m going to embarrass you and make you uncomfortable.” It’s just that simple. And you need to stop letting them hold you hostage with their behavior.
Remember this: When you don’t give in to your child, they have to figure out another way to solve their problem.

Leave them at home. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with leaving your child at home with proper supervision and telling them, “You can’t come today because you can’t handle it. You made a scene last time we went shopping and so today you’re staying home.” And if your child promises and begs and swears, say, “No, let's see how you behave staying at home. If you handle that OK, then we'll see.” And make them sit at home. Make them understand that you’re not going to be blackmailed and that you’re strong—and that when you make decisions, you’re going to stick with them.

Here’s the simple truth: when children resort to inappropriate behavior to get their way, they don’t learn how to solve problems. And when they don’t learn this skill, they go into adulthood with a real handicap. You see many adults who only know how to get angry and yell at each other whenever there’s emotional stress. Part of that is because they have very poor communication skills and very poor problem-solving skills. When confronted with a problem, they only know how to avoid it, which means they let it build up on the inside until they explode.

So make up your mind that you’re not going to let your child hold you hostage with their misbehavior. Don’t give in to emotional blackmail when your child threatens to act out. I tell parents to think of it this way: your child has got to get to bed tonight without a crisis. That’s their goal. And our goal as a parent is the same thing: to get to bed tonight without a crisis and to teach our children the skills they need. If you can do that, then you’re all set.

New President

This was sent to me by a friend. Unfortunatly there was no name attached as to who the author is. Even though I find some of the things this person says offensive...he/she has a point!

Not the end of the world

It's easy to let yourself go in despair and start thinking things like "We are well-and-truly fucked" or "This is the worst of all possible outcomes". But it isn't true.
I think this election is going to be a "coming of age" moment for a lot of people. They say, "Be careful what you wish for" and a lot of people got their wish yesterday.
And now they're bound to be disappointed. Not even Jesus could satisfy all the expectations of Obama's most vocal supporters, or fulfill all the promises Obama has made.
I think Obama is going to turn out to be the worst president since Carter, and for the same reason: good intentions do not guarantee good results. Idealists often stub their toes on the wayward rocks of reality, and fall on their faces. And the world doesn't respond to benign behavior benignly.

But there's another reason why: Obama has been hiding his light under a basket. A lot of people bought a pig in a poke today, and now they're going to find out what they bought. Obama isn't what most of them think he is. The intoxication of the cult will wear off, leaving a monumental hangover.

And four years from now they'll be older and much wiser.
A lot of bad things are going to happen during this term. But I don't think that this is an irreversible catastrophe for the union. I've lived long enough to absorb this basic truth: the US is too large and too strong to destroy in just 4 years. Or even in 8. We survived 6 years of Nixon. We survived 4 years of Carter. We even survived 8 years of Clinton, God alone knows how.
The President of the United States is the most powerful political figure in the world, but as national executives go his powers are actually quite restricted. Obama will become President, but he won't be dictator or king, let alone deity. He still has to work with the House and the Senate, and he still has to live within Constitutional restrictions, and with a judiciary that he mostly didn't appoint.

The main reason this will be a "coming of age" moment is that now Obama and the Democrats have to put up or shut up. Obama got elected by making himself a blank slate, with vapid promises about "hope" and "change" -- but now he actually has to do something. Now he has to reveal his true agenda. And with the Democrats also having a majority in both chambers of Congress, now the Democrats really have to lead. And they're not going to do a very good job of it. It's going to be amusing to watch.

And the people who fell for the demagoguery will learn an invaluable lesson.
Oh, the Democrats try to blame failure on Republican filibusters, of which there will be many. But that's always been a factor in our system, and many people believe it's an important check on government excess. The tradition in the Senate is that it is supposed to be a buffer against transient political fads, and the filibuster is a major part of that.

If the Democrats go all in, and change the filibuster rule, then they'll have truly seized the nettle with both hands and won't have any excuses any longer. That's why they won't do it. It's their last fig-leaf. But even with the filibuster rule in place, they'll be stuck trying to deliver now on all the promises implied, or inferred, during this election. The Republicans can only filibuster on bills the Democrats have already proposed.

And it ain't possible for the Democrats to deliver what's been promised. Gonna be a hell of a lot of disillusioned lefties out there. A lot of people who felt they were deceived. A lot of people who will eventually realize that the Obama campaign was something of a cult.
Disillusionment will turn to a feeling of betrayal. And that will, in turn, convert to anger.
In the mean time, Obama and Congressional Democrats will do things that cause harm, but very little of it will be irreversible.

I would have enjoyed watching lefty heads explode if McCain had won. But we're going to see lefty heads exploding anyway; it's just going to take longer.
In the mean time, those of us who didn't want Obama to be president have to accept that he is. And let's not give in to the kind of paranoid fever dreams that have consumed the left for the last 8 years. Let us collectively take a vow tonight: no "Obama derangement syndrome". Obama is a politician. He isn't the devil incarnate.

So what are the good sides of what just happened?
1. It is no longer possible for anyone to deny that the MSM is heavily biased. The MSM have been biased for decades but managed an illusion of fairness. That is no longer possible; the MSM have squandered their credibility during this campaign. They'll never get that credibility back again.
2. Since the Democrats got nearly everything they hoped for in this campaign, they'll have no excuses and will have to produce. They'll have to reveal their true agenda -- or else make clear that they don't really have any beyond gaining power.
3. Every few decades the American people have to be reminded that peace only comes with strength. The next four years will be this generation's lesson.

Now, a few predictions for the next four years:
1. Obama's "hold out your hand to everyone" foreign policy is going to be a catastrophe. They'll love it in Europe. They're probably laughing their heads off about it in the middle east already.
2. The US hasn't suffered a terrorist attack by al Qaeda since 9/11, but we'll get at least one during Obama's term.
3. We're going to lose in Afghanistan.
4. Iran will get nuclear weapons. There will be nuclear war between Iran and Israel. (This is the only irreversibly terrible thing I see upcoming, and it's very bad indeed.)
5. There will eventually be a press backlash against Obama which will make their treatment of Bush look mild. Partly that's going to be because Obama is going to disappoint them just as much as all his other supporters. Partly it will be the MSM desperately trying to regain its own credibility, by trying to show that they're not in his tank any longer. And because of that they are eventually going to do the reporting they should have done during this campaign, about Obama's less-than-savory friends, and about voter fraud, and about illegal fund-raising, and about a lot of other things.
6. Obama will not be re-elected in 2012. He may even end up doing an LBJ and not even running again.

One last thing: I'm not saying I'm happy with this outcome. I would much rather have had McCain win. But this is not the end of the world, or the end of this nation. We've survived much worse.

And now we need to show the lefties how to lose. Our mission for the next four years is to be in opposition without becoming deranged.
UPDATE: One other good thing: no one will be spinning grand conspiracy theories about this administration's Vice President being an evil, conniving genius who is the true power behind the throne.

Raspberry Rhapsody Salad*

6 oz pkg. raspberry Jello2 cups boiling water2 cups raspberry sherbet1/2 to 1 cup frozen or fresh raspberries
Dissolve Jello in boiling water. Add sherbet and stir until melted. Add raspberries and chill until set. You can change the Jello to orange and use orange sherbet and mandarin oranges or strawberry Jello with strawberry sherbet and strawberries.
Here is another recipe continuing our theme of making the most of those garden leftovers:

Freezer Corn

1/2 lb. butter11-12 cups corn (about 20 ears)1 cup half and half1/2 tsp. salt
Cut the corn off of the ears. Mix everything and bake at 300 ° for 1 hour. Stir every 15 minutes or so. Let it cool. Place in freezer bags or containers and freeze.
This makes a great and easy side dish that you will then have available when you need something tasty in a hurry!

No Mess Dinner

1 pork chop (about 4 oz.)1 medium potato, sliced1 large carrot, sliced1/4 cup frozen peas1 Tbsp. onion soup mix
Lay chop on a double thickness of heavy duty foil, about 18 x14 inches. Layer with potato, carrot, and peas and sprinkle with soup mix. Seal well. Place on grill and cooked covered over medium heat for about 30 minutes or until meat juices run clear. Turn occasionally.

*Chocolate Peanut Butter Pizza

1 pkg.(17 1/2 oz.) peanut butter cookie mix*12 oz. cream cheese, softened1 3/4 cups milk1 pkg. (3.9 oz) instant chocolate pudding1 (8 oz.) container whipped topping1/4 cup chocolate or peanut butter chips
Prepare cookie dough according to directions and press into a 12 inch pizza pan. Bake at 375° for 15 minutes. Whip cream cheese in bowl until smooth and spread over cooled crust. In the same bowl, mix milk and pudding for 2 minutes. Spread over cream cheese. Refrigerate until set, about 20 minutes. Top with whipped topping and sprinkle with chips. Chill for 1-2 hours.

*Note: You can use your own homemade cookie dough if you want. If there is extra dough left over, just bake it up into cookies while you are baking the above or freeze to use later. Experiment with different cookie dough. For example, use sugar cookie or chocolate chip in place of peanut butter.

*Swiss Steak

2 lbs. round steak2 Tbsp. flour1/2 tsp. saltdash of pepper1 Tbsp. oil1 medium onion, chopped2-3 stalks celery, chopped1/4 cup green pepper, chopped1 cup tomatoes, peeled2 carrots, sliced (optional)2 cups water8 potatoes, boiled or mashed (optional)
Mix flour salt and pepper in a small bowl. Rub into round steak. Cut into serving-sized pieces. Brown meat in oil in a skillet over medium heat. Pour all vegetables except potatoes over steak and add water. Cover and reduce heat to low. Simmer 1 to 1 1/2 hours or all day on low in the crock pot. Serve over potatoes if desired. Serves 4.

Swiss Steak
2-3 lbs. round steakFlourSalt, pepper, onion and garlic powder1/2 cup water1/2 cup sour cream
Mix the flour with seasonings. Dredge the steak in the flour mixture. In a frying pan that has a small amount of oil, brown steak on both sides. Add water, turn down heat, cover and simmer for about 2 1/2 hours. Add sour cream just before serving.

*Garlic Green Beans
2 Tbsp. olive oil3 tsp. cider vinegar2 tsp. dried onion2 cloves garlic, finely choppedSalt and pepper3 cups frozen green beans, thawed3 Tbsp. bread crumbs3 Tbsp. Parmesan cheese, grated1 Tbsp. butter or margarine, melted
Mix first 5 ingredients. Add beans and coat with mixture. Pour into greased baking dish. Mix bread crumbs, cheese and butter and sprinkle over bean mixture. Bake uncovered at 350° for about 15 minutes. It just needs to be heated through.

*Coconut Brownies
1/4 cup butter, melted1/4 cup brown sugar2 eggs1 tsp. vanilla3/4 cup flour1 tsp. baking powder1/2 tsp. salt1/2 -3/4 cup nuts

Topping:
1/4 cup butter, melted1/2 brown sugar1 cup coconut
Mix butter, sugar, eggs and vanilla. Add flour, baking powder, salt and nuts. Mix well. Pour into greased 8x8 pan and bake at 350° for 30 minutes or until done.
Mix topping ingredients and spread over baked brownies. Place under the broiler (3 inches from heat) to slightly brown coconut.

**Fried Green Tomatoes
2 qts. water2 Tbsp. salt4-6 medium green tomatoes, unpeeled and sliced1 cup flour1/2 cup vegetable oil or bacon greasesalt (to taste)
In a mixing bowl, mix salt and water. Soak sliced tomatoes in salt water mixture for 30-40 minutes. Drain and drop slices a few at time into a bag in which you have placed the flour. Shake thoroughly to coat. Heat the oil in a large skillet and carefully place the slices into the hot oil. Brown until crisp on both sides. Salt to taste. You can also use squash, zucchini or eggplant in place of or with the green tomatoes. Serves 4-6.

apple Crisp, Butter, Pie and Fried Apples

Apple Crisp

6 apples, peeled and sliced1/2 cup butter or margarine, softened1 cup brown sugar1/2 cup oatmeal1/2 cup flour1 tsp. cinnamon and/or nutmeg1/2 cup water
Preheat oven to 350°. Arrange apples in well-greased baking dish. Blend all remaining ingredients except water. Spread evenly over top of apples. Pour water over the topping. Bake 45 minutes until apples are tender and top is crisp. Serves 6.

Apple Butter

9 to 10 apples, cored, peeled and chopped2 cups sugar2 tsp. cinnamon1/8 tsp. cloves1/8 tsp. salt
Place everything into a crock pot. Stir, cover and cook on high 1 hour. Cook on low for 9-11 hours or until thick and dark brown. Stir occasionally. Uncover and cook on low 1 hour longer. Stir with whisk until smooth. Refrigerate or Freeze. Makes 2 pints.

Apple Pie Filling

9 cups baking apples, peeled, cored and sliced1 1/2 Tbsp. lemon juice5 cups water2 1/4 cup sugar1/2 cup cornstarch1/2 tsp. salt1 tsp. ground cinnamon1/8 tsp. nutmeg
Toss apples with lemon juice and set aside. Combine the rest of the ingredients in Dutch oven and bring to a boil for 2 minutes, stirring constantly. Add apples and return to boil. Reduce heat, cover and simmer until apples are tender (6-10 minutes). Cool for 30 minutes. Then ladle into freezer containers or bake immediately. Makes two 9-inch pies.

Fried Apples

4 large apples, cored and sliced3 Tbsp. butter or margarine1/3 cup brown sugar1/2 tsp. ground cinnamon
Cut apples into 1/4 inch slices. Heat butter in a large skillet. Put the apples, brown sugar, and cinnamon in the skillet and cover. Over medium-low heat, cook apple slices 7-10 minutes or until they begin to soften and the syrup thickens. Serve coated with excess syrup on top. Serves 4.

Key Lime Pie

INGREDIENTS
Crust
16 Graham Crackers3 T. sugar1 cube (1/4 lb) butter

Pie
4 Large or extra large egg yolks1 14 ounce can sweetened condensed milk1/2 cup key lime juice (approx 12 key limes.)2 teaspoons grated lime peel, green portion onlyWhipping Cream Garnish (optional)1/2 cup whipping cream2 teaspoons granulated sugar1/4 teaspoon vanilla

INSTRUCTIONS

Crust
Mix the ingredients and press them into a 9" pie plate. Bake in preheated 350 degree oven for 10 -12 minutes. Place on rack to cool.

Pie Filling
Use an electric mixer and beat the egg yolks until they are thick and turn a light yellow. Don't over mix. Turn off mixer and add sweetened condensed milk. Turn speed to low and mis in half of the lime juice. Once the juice is incorporated add the other half and the zest, continue to mix until blended (just a few seconds). Pour the mixture into the pie shell and bake at 350 degrees for 12 minutes.GarnishMix all 3 ingredients until soft peeks form. Serve a dollop of whipped cream on each slice.

Cinnamon Roll Pudding

Save those one or two cinnamon rolls or donuts that dry out or get stale and toss them in the freezer. You will always have them then to make this yummy "comfort food" dessert. This would be a nice dish for something different for a brunch.

2-4 cinnamon rolls or donuts (about 3 cups)2 eggs1 1/2 cups milk3/4 cup sugar1 tsp. vanilla1/4 tsp. salt1/4 cup margarine or butter, melted2 Tbsp. honeyCaramel ice cream topping

Place torn rolls into a 1 quart greased baking dish. In a bowl, slightly beat eggs and add milk, sugar, salt and vanilla and mix. Pour over rolls. Combine honey and butter and pour over everything. Bake at 300° for 1 hour or until lightly brown. Serve with caramel topping. Makes 4-6 servings.

Lemon Fluff*

1 3/4 cup milk
2 (3 oz) pkgs. vanilla instant pudding
1 can frozen lemonade concentrate (thawed)
1 (8 oz) tub whipped topping

Mix milk and pudding in bowl with whisk for 30 seconds. Add lemonade and whisk 30 more seconds. Fold in whipped topping. Chill 4 hours. You can use this with or without a pie crust.

Mexican Summer Squash

4 yellow summer squash4 ears corn3 ripe tomatoes1/4 cup butter1 small onion, choppedsalt and pepper (to taste)
Wash squash and cut into small pieces. Cut corn from the cob, skin tomato (the skin comes off easily if they are first dipped in boiling water for one minute) and cut into cubes. Heat butter in saucepan. Stir in onion and cook until limp but not brown. Add squash, corn, tomatoes, salt and pepper. Cover and cook over a low heat for 30-40 minutes, stirring occasionally. if desired, serve over cooked rice. Serves 4.
This is such a light and not overly sweet dessert for summer:

Picture Study Information

One of the things I always wished I knew more about/paid more attention to was art and artists. As I got older and realized that cultured people knew things about art-- styles, forms, artists, periods, etc.-- I regretted not making it a priority to be more acquainted with such things when I was in school. I assessed that people who were educated and well-rounded should know a little something about all the arts. I even flirted with the idea of becoming an art history major briefly.For these reasons, I determined when we started homeschooling that we were going to dive into the arts. I had high hopes, as the song goes, but I just found that all things artsy got pushed to the back burner in favor of doing things like multiplication tables and learning how to read. And yet, that whole "well-rounded education thing" kept tugging at me.This is part of the reason why we are participating in Monday's Artists this year (see the interview I posted on Monday to learn more about this program)-- to guarantee my children's exposure to the arts to whatever degree they want to absorb it. I predict that some of them will love it more than others. One of mine is very excited about art class, the other wants to learn more about music. The point is, they are learning what's out there to choose from.Today I read an explanation about what Charlotte Mason termed "picture study"-- an easy, no-stress way to expose our kids to great art and the artists behind the works. (I have been reading up and refreshing myself in all things Charlotte Mason as we are preparing for a new school year.) One of the ladies wrote this great explanation that I wanted to share with you here. She makes it sound easy enough that any of us could do it! I love that!When I first started doing picture studies with my girls, I felt a little overwhelmed because I thought I had to research each picture and tell them all the particulars about it, really "educate" them on the meaning behind the picture, etc. Then I saw a woman teach a picture study,and I realized that it was quite simple. You tell them ahead of time to look at the picture for about a minute or two. Tell them to remember everything they can about the picture (the people, where they were sitting or standing, describe any animals, the landscape, placement of objects, the colors and where they were located, etc.) because you're going to turn the picture over so they can't see it any longer. Let your children take turns telling what they saw. For younger children, be sure to warn them in advance that you want them to "tell back" what they saw. This process sharpen their attention skills, and they will walk away having an image of the picture in their minds. You could also ask your children to draw/paint the picture because this gives them the opportunity to focus on the details as well. You can choose an artist to study for a month or six weeks, focusing on a different picture each week. Large coffee-table type art books are readily available at most libraries, as are picture book biographies about the more well-known artists. By investing in an easel stand, you can display the "picture of the week" in your home for everyone to enjoy. At the end of that month or six weeks, everyone will be well acquainted with the works of that artist. Then you can switch to another one!My girls have gotten excited afterwards when seeing a picture they've studied framed in a store, printed in a book, or viewed in an art gallery. Charlotte Mason's goal of picture study was to help the child increase his attention while at the same time forming a relationship with the picture and the artist. You could read a picture book about the artist and their life or simply learn about the artist's childhood-- something your young children may be interested in at this point of their lives. Another woman wrote:I think two good artists for beginning picture study with young children are Mary Cassatt and Grandma Moses. I did those two with my 4, 7, 10, and 12 yr old nieces and nephews who were living with me last year (plus it was the first time I had done this with my 15 yr old son). I found books in the juvenile department of the library about the artists - picture book style for the younger children. I found the Mary Cassatt prints online. I put them on a disk and took them to Staples to be printed as 8X10's for around $1 each.(I will add to this one that, if you do Grandma Moses, be sure to see if your library has any Will Moses (her great grandson) picture books to read during this time.)I will also add that it is good to study nature artists like John James Audubon, Beatrix Potter, etc. as you can incorporate a real love of nature and God's brilliant creations at the same time. God pays such attention to the details of His creation, and these artists really showcased those details.These ladies make picture study sound so doable and relatively effortless that I was challenged to add this element to our school year. I know that not all of you who read this blog are homeschoolers, but this is something easy we can all do in our homes to enrich our lives by interacting with great works and great minds in our everyday lives, having natural conversations along the way and fostering in our children an awarness and appreciation for the finer things in life.Philippians 4:8, "Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-- think about such things."

Cole Slaw, Fried Potatoes and Frozen Fruit Cocktail

Cole Slaw
1/2 cup mayonnaise or salad dressing1/4 cup sugar3 carrots, shredded1 small head cabbage, shredded
Mix mayonnaise or salad dressing in a bowl with the sugar. Mix cabbage and carrots together. Add sauce to cabbage and carrots just before serving. The dressing can be made in advance and stored in a separate container in the refrigerator. Serves 8.

Fried Potatoes*
6 potatoes, peeled and sliced2-3 Tbsp. bacon grease (You can use margarine but the flavor isn't quite the same)
Melt grease in a hot frying pan. Add the potatoes and cook over medium high heat. When golden brown flip to the other side and cook until side is brown and potatoes are tender. Salt and pepper to taste.

Frozen Fruit Cocktail*
8 oz. cream cheese, softened1 can (16 oz) fruit cocktail
Whisk or beat cream cheese until smooth. Drain fruit, mix into cream cheese and pour into a loaf pan (or anything freezer proof and about that size). Freeze. Let thaw slightly before you are ready to serve. Slice like you would bread. Sometimes a warm knife makes it easier.
This can be served with a dollop of whipped cream for dessert or on a lettuce leaf for a salad. You can also use other kinds of canned fruit but the fruit cocktail tastes really good frozen like this.

9 Words Women Use

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or Faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' ... that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever: Is a women's way of saying FUDGE YOU!

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

Homeschoolers Threaten Our Cultural Comfort

Home-schoolers threaten our cultural comfort

6/8/2008 9:39:01 AMDaily Journal

You see them at the grocery, or in a discount store.It's a big family by today’s standards - "just like stair steps," as the old folks say. Freshly scrubbed boys with neatly trimmed hair and girls with braids, in clean but unfashionable clothes follow mom through the store as she fills her no-frills shopping list.There's no begging for gimcracks, no fretting, and no threats from mom. The older watch the younger, freeing mom to go peacefully about her task. You are looking at some of the estimated 2 million children being home schooled in the U.S., and the number is growing. Their reputation for academic achievement has caused colleges to begin aggressively recruiting them. Savings to the taxpayers in instructional costs are conservatively estimated at $4 billion, and some place the figure as high as $9 billion. When you consider that these families pay taxes to support public schools, but demand nothing from them, it seems quite a deal for the public.Home schooling parents are usually better educated than the norm, and are more likely to attend worship services. Their motives are many and varied. Some fear contagion from the anti-clericalism, coarse speech, suggestive behavior and hedonistic values that characterize secular schools. Others are concerned for their children’s safety. Some want their children to be challenged beyond the minimal competencies of the public schools. Concern for a theistic world view largely permeates the movement.Indications are that home schooling is working well for the kids, and the parents are pleased with their choice, but the practice is coming under increasing suspicion, and even official attack, as in California. Why do we hate (or at least distrust) these people so much?Methinks American middle-class people are uncomfortable around the home schooled for the same reason the alcoholic is uneasy around the teetotaler. Their very existence represents a rejection of our values, and an indictment of our lifestyles. Those families are willing to render unto Caesar the things that Caesar’s be, but they draw the line at their children. Those of us who have put our trust in the secular state (and effectively surrendered our children to it) recognize this act of defiance as a rejection of our values, and we reject them in return. Just as the jealous Chaldeans schemed to bring the wrath of the king upon the Hebrew eunuchs, we are happy to sic the state’s bureaucrats on these “trouble makers.” Their implicit rejection of America’s most venerated idol, Materialism, (a.k.a. “Individualism”) spurs us to heat the furnace and feed the lions.Young families must make the decision: Will junior go to day care and day school, or will mom stay home and raise him? The rationalizations begin. "A family just can't make it on one income." (Our parents did.) "It just costs so much to raise a child nowadays." (Yeah, if you buy brand-name clothing, pre-prepared food, join every club and activity, and spend half the cost of a house on the daughter’s wedding, it does.) And so, the decision is made. We give up the bulk of our waking hours with our children, as well as the formation of their minds, philosophies, and attitudes, to strangers. We compensate by getting a boat to take them to the river, a van to carry them to Little League, a 2,800-square-foot house, an ATV, a zero-turn Cub Cadet, and a fund to finance a brand-name college education. And most significantly, we claim “our right” to pursue a career for our own "self-fulfillment."Deep down, however, we know that our generation has eaten its seed corn. We lack the discipline and the vision to deny ourselves in the hope of something enduring and worthy for our posterity. We are tired from working extra jobs, and the looming depression threatens our 401k’s. Credit cards are nearly maxed, and it costs a $100 to fuel the Suburban. Now the kid is raising hell again, demanding the latest Play Station as his price for doing his school work … and there goes that modest young woman in the home-made dress with her four bright-eyed, well-behaved home-schooled children in tow. Wouldn’t you just love to wipe that serene look right off her smug face?Is it any wonder we hate her so?Sonny Scott a community columnist, lives on Sparta Road in Chickasaw County and his e-mail address is sonnyscott@yahoo.com.